thanksgriving; family style

Everyone in my family is insane. This is why I like hanging out with my family. Now, it's the good insane that makes you nicer and not the bad insane that makes you kill people. But still, it makes for entertaining family gatherings.

Here are the highlights of my Thanksgiving Day (I was there just one day) just to give you an idea:

- My cousin, affectionately nicknamed "Ruthie the terrorist" (for reasons you may surmise) wanted to make corn muffins, so we decided to appease her rather than negotiate. For some reason she made about 10 billion muffins. I helped her to help her mom, who was busy with her other 11 children and trying to make the rest of dinner on the side. We had to do the actual baking in the apartment built onto my aunt's house as both of the regular ovens were filled with turkeys. The first time I went up there, to turn to oven on, I heard the shower going, and yet the bathroom door was wide open. My initial thought was that I should sneak in the bathroom and pull back the curtain and scare the living shibbity out of whoever was in there. I mean - we're all family right? I decided against this plan because 1. it was a holiday after all and 2. I would most likely end up getting chased around by a naked person wielding a shampoo bottle afterward. Well, I'm glad I didn't end up following my original instinct because I later found out the person in the shower was my cousin's husband. That would have been infamous. "Remember the Thanksgiving that Kristin saw Robbie naked?" Awkward. (P.S. the corn muffins ended up sticking to the pan and I think we threw most of them away.)

- During my uncle's Thanksgiving prayer, my aunt (the wife of said uncle) reminded him of the people that he had left off blessing. ("Don't forget Ryan", "And Linda's brother-in-law, Martin".) This, of course, caused the rest of us to open our eyes and give each other looks and then stuff our hands into our mouths so we wouldn't burst out laughing and ruin the rest of the prayer. At least we know for next year that requests mid-prayer are perfectly acceptable.

- My cousin, Sarah, told me about her family's not so subtle hints that it's time for her and her husband (the one I did not see naked) to concieve. (I have not seen any of my cousins-in-law naked.) Here is my favorite: Last Christmas, Olivia, who is 9 years old now, wanted to play Baby Jesus in the family rendition of the Christmas story. The family patiently explained that she was far to old to play a baby. Ruthie tactfully pointed out, "Well, if someone would have a baby, maybe we could have a real Baby Jesus!" (Yes, even the 11 year olds feel they have a say in their siblings family planning now.)

- For some reason, my dad thought it would be a good idea for us to take our family Christmas card picture at 11:00 at night, right before we were leaving. I can only imagine what people will think when they see it. ("Oh dear - they've been into the cooking sherry again.") At least I was wearing my "Girls Just Wanna Have Rum" shirt.