Thursday, July 30, 2009

excuse me, what did you just say?

Many of you know that my roommate recently got engaged. (Congratulations, Scout!) Consequently, she will be moving out soon. How soon? Sometime before Christmas, will you please stop asking her?

Last night, I was talking to Legolas and he said if he could somehow get his roommate to get married, why then we could move in together! (He was joking, naturally, since we're both Mormon and that's frowned upon.)

Lest you worry about my mortal soul by me moving in with a boy when we are both still single, I will tell you it would never work out and here's why. The next thing he said was, "Of course, I own my place, so you'd probably have to move in here. It's a bit smaller, so we'd probably have to box up your books and put them into storage." And the thing is he wasn't joking!

I just stared at him a moment, my jaw moving up and down as I tried to come up with something to say to that. I mean - who ever heard of such a thing? Boxing up books to save room. It doesn't even make sense to my brain.

I write about books about every other post here, so I know you know how I feel about books. And I know some of you feel the same way too, but some of you don't. I guess it's the same with anything. I don't understand how people can be passionate about camping and hunting. Or being a Republican. Or watching The Gilmore Girls. People love all these things and it makes no sense to me. So, I guess sometimes people don't understand why I love books so much.

Point being - I couldn't even pretend to want to move in with Legolas if he has no room for my books in his house. Instead, I will stay in my own place and turn Scout's room into the library. Now there's a win-win situation.

Wednesday, July 22, 2009

for the record, i would just like to point out that you are wrong

I think it was in an Agatha Christie book where I first read of this idea: you can go years without thinking or hearing about a particular idea, and then suddenly you will hear about the idea twice in the course of a week.

Well, three times since last Friday I have heard people call Twilight the new Harry Potter. Pffffffft, I say! Pfffffffffft! This is the most ridiculous notion I've ever heard.

First off, I would like to point out that I am authorized to comment on this notion because I have read each series. (Okay, I didn't read the last book in the Twilight series, but Lady MacBeth did, and I'm taking her word for it that it was awful.) (And technically I only skimmed 2 and 3 because I'd promised I'd read them, but really I read the synopsis on Wikipediea and then just bolted through them.) Also, I started reading both series before all the hype. So, I didn't jump in expecting them to be either good or bad. In fact, I had expected Twilight to be good by how much the book was recommended to me. I started out thinking it was an intriguing idea. It was only when I was about half way through I remember thinking - wait, where's the plot in this book? And once I'd finished I thought - wait, the villain didn't show up until the last chapter; did anyone else notice this book has no plot?

Harry Potter was different. I can specifically remember the third book coming out a few weeks before my birthday. I knew I was going to get the book for my birthday, but I still wanted to read it. I can still see myself reading the first few chapters in the bookstore, hoping I wouldn't get kicked out. And then I remember just reading all day through on my birthday. I still remember the shock I felt when I realized that Lupin had betrayed Harry by letting Sirus Black into Hogwarts. Lupin, we trusted you! Point being here - I fell in love with the series before everyone was saying how good it was; before the midnight release parties and all that.

So, why isn't Twilight the next Harry Potter? Well, first off, to call anything "the next" of something else kind of belittles the work of both parties. Both authors put in quite a lot of work. And second, despite Stephanie Meyer's hard work, Twilight really just isn't good. It doesn't have believable characters, it has hardly any plot, and the writing is just awful. I'm not saying Harry Potter is going up for any major awards in literature, but at least it manages to stay interesting. The characters are interesting, it actually has a plot, and you can tell that someone has edited it.

Now, I can actually see the draw that Twilight has for women. Bella thinks she is not very pretty and yet this amazingly attractive man (vampire) is in love with her. What woman doesn't feel ugly some of the time? And what woman doesn't want some god of a man fawning all over her for no other reason than she is what she is? I think one of the reasons this annoyed me so much in the books is that we are absolutely beat to death with this topic. It's pretty much the only thing the books are about - Edward is goreous and Bella loves him. There's nothing about personality or anything substantial. The vampire bit is just thrown in there to try to persuade us that it's actually a fantasy book and not a cheap romance novel.

Harry Potter, on the other hand, is way more believable. Yes, even with the elements of wizardry. The characters grow and progress. They make mistakes. There is a real antagonist who causes real harm, and yet every book has a distinct plot. They aren't just fighting Voldemort each time. The characters are human and flawed and relatable. And yet, there is humor in the books too - they don't take themselves too seriously. I wouldn't even say that Harry Potter is my favorite series of all time, just that it's loads better than Twilight.

Basically, it comes down to this: Harry Potter is about dealing with life and growing and adapting and also fighting real evil and doing the right thing. Twilight is about being unconditionally devoted to someone just because he's hot and wanting to have sex with him.

Harry Potter and Twilight are not even in the same category of books. They are just compared because they were both very popular. (Though, being popular is not the same as being good.)

And how do Edward and Harry feel about each other? (Sorry if you've already seen this.) (And it has PG-13 language, just FYI.)

Edward vs. Harry

Thursday, July 16, 2009

a modest proposal

I have come up with a new Plan. Have you ever noticed how men my age seem to like younger girls, in terms of dating. Young, pretty girls. When men find out how old I am (almost 24!) they just see a haggard old maid. I'm not saying that's right or wrong. I mean, I was 19 once and I blew my chances! I know people say that 30 is the new 20, but I'm tired of waiting around.

So I've decided to become a second wife. I think it's a good plan. I can marry someone who's already "been there, done that" and can show me the ropes of marriage. Plus, I'm aiming for someone in their 30s, so hopefully he's already established in a career and hopefully debt free. There could be a couple of kids around, but since he has either been grieving the loss of his dead wife or has felt bitter about his divorce, I bet the youngest one would be at least three. (So the plan is Raskolnikov approved - no babies.) (Since I'm always trying to follow Raskolnikov approved plans.) I think I'd be a good step-mom. I will be firm, but kind.

A few of you marrieds have already graciously offered your husbands upon your demise, which I think is very kind of you. If anyone else knows of any thirty-something widowers, be sure to point them in my direction.

Monday, July 13, 2009

nerd alert!

I'm a nerd; I know it. I guess it comes with the territory. It's hard to be a computer programmer by profession and not have geeky tendencies. I would say I'm not the worst nerd because I'm definitely not the best at what I do, but I am good enough to get by. And to enjoy things like xkcd and thedailywtf because I usually understand them.

Part of being a nerd is that I like numbers and calculations. In Columbus, one of the main highways through the city, 315, is currently under construction. Of course, this is the road I take to get to and from work. Contrary to being a problem, however, it has actually made my commute home much smoother. While the four mile stretch of road has a very strictly enforced 45 MPH zone, the traffic is always much less. So even though I'm driving slower, I am driving at a consistent speed with no slow downs or stops like my commute would be without the construction. I was wondering if the construction actually sped up my commute home. With various assumptions and calculations that I won't bore you with here, I discovered that with my margin of error, it is probably about the same travel time with or without the construction. And I actually feel like I come out on top with the construction because there is no congestion, so it feels like I'm getting home faster. Point being - I like the numbers proving that I'm not getting home any slower.

Other nerdy things this week:
- practical jokes nerds play : the it crowd (i love this show!)
- At work today, my boss told us that we don't have to support Internet Explorer for the project we're working on, just Firefox. One of my coworkers asked if we could stop supporting Windows and just support Linux. (Trust me, it's funny.)
- Another funny quote (to me) from the it crowd is when the lady tells the two nerds at a dinner party that they're all going to not to just talk about boring things all night like memory and RAM and one of them says, "RAM is memory!"
- I'm not sure if you've noticed, but I always edit the HTML of my posts so that links will pop up in a new window instead of taking over the current page. (Except for the link in my last post, because I wanted it to take over the page.) Today I changed the color of my links too, just because I can. (Though, that's not really super nerdy because anyone can do that.)
- Yesterday I got super excited talking to a guy in my ward who is also a computer nerd. He built his own router! It's nice to have someone to talk to who 1. understands what I'm talking about and 2. doesn't mock me for it, like most of my friends. (I'm looking directly at you, Legolas.)

Friday, July 10, 2009

a place of love and beauty

I know I'm not one to mention serious or spiritual things on this blog much. I'm probably not a very serious and spiritual person. So, I'll keep this brief.

Last night I went to the temple with a couple of friends. Kind of an impromptu ward temple night with just about as many people from our ward who would usually come. And it was just nice. I don't know what made this session so good, but I felt like I really learned a lot about myself and my relationship with my Heavenly Father. There's just something about the temple that seems to help me take of my rough edges (which are many) and remember who I am.

So, that's all. Go to the temple.

Wednesday, July 8, 2009

books and dad

I love reading and I love books. I think this is a well established fact about me. Well, my parents are in the process of trying to get rid of some of their stuff. I told them I would take any books off their hands that they didn't want. (The books are part of my inheritance from the padres anyway.) A few days ago, I was with my dad and without any warning he asked me, "Why do you want those books?!" The question surprised me as well as his tone. He asked me the question with something nearing contempt. It was the same tone that he might have asked me, "Why did you steal my identity?" or "Why did you sleep with my best friend, thus ruining his chances of becoming a minister?" It almost made me feel like I'd done something wrong by wanting those books.

Luckily, I know my dad pretty well and I know he didn't really mean it like that. Lots of times he just doesn't realize how things come out. He probably thought that we'd talked about me taking books before and that I didn't give a satisfactory answer, so he needed to ask again. (This happens with dad a lot - he thinks he talked to you about something, but really he was just thinking about it. He's not spacey; he's an engineer. I really do think that is an adequate explanation.)

The answer I gave him was something about how books are expensive and I liked having a lot of books because when I have kids I want them to have ready access to books and to know that reading is important. (Bringing theoretical grandchildren into the argument is a sure win with dad. How can he let these little guys down? He just loves them too much.) He thought about that for a second and seemed to accept it. Then he asked, in a milder tone, "But you don't want those old text books for anything do you? Those things are worthless." (Aha! The crux of the matter!) I didn't even realize old text books were up for grabs and to make him happy I said I didn't want them. (Of course I probably would take them; it might be interesting.)

Dad continued, "Okay.... well, at least now I have some idea of what to keep and what to chuck." I thought the only thing we established was it was okay to not keep old textbooks. That's not a very big category of books, but again - whatever. Then I realized that he'd used the word "chuck" to describe what he was going to do to books. This kind of makes my blood run cold. I said, "But, you don't really mean, 'throw away' right? You'll at least give them to Goodwill, right?" He replied, "Who wants old textbooks?"

Man, sounds like dad is hiding something. What's in those old books - Sectumsempra? I'll have to check them out before they get chucked.

(ps. Don't forget to check out kristin and erin's online bookclub. The new book for July has been selected.)

Wednesday, July 1, 2009

one short day in the emerald city

I am in Provo, Utah today. I flew in last night and I'm leaving tomorrow. I'm driving back to the Ohio with my little sister, Lydia. (She asked me to come so she wouldn't have to drive by herself.) So, the questions is - what does one do in Provo for one day?

Well, in my case, a lot of the day was spent in Salt Lake. I went to lunch with a friend. Then I headed off to my favorite little bookshop, The King's English, to meet up with the Librarian. Of all the things I miss in Utah (other than people) The King's English is what I miss the most. After the Librarian had to return to work, I lingered for a while, browsing books and missing having a really good bookshop to go to.

Next, I stopped at the BYU bookstore to get one of my favorite things in the whole world: chocolate covered cinnamon bears. Mmmmmm! I also got a new CTR ring. I lost my old one in the Caribbean Sea when I forgot to take it off while snorkeling in Belize. I know it's kind of lame, but I got one that was exactly the same as the one I lost. I suppose I just like things to be the same.

The rest of the day has just been spent helping Lydia pack stuff up. In the evening, Lydia, Lizzy and I went to dinner at P.F. Chang's. (Lizzy is my older sister who teaches statistics at BYU and the owner of the "Provo Motel" where I am staying last night and tonight. The Provo Motel does not have a very comfortable couch. But, hey - it's free.) Lizzy had a $50 gift certificate to the restaurant, so even with lettuce wraps and desserts, we only spent a total of $3. (We left a big tip.)

And that was my one day in Utah. The thing that kind of surprised me is how familiar everything was as I drove around. I mean, I've only been living out of Utah for a year and a half, but I've been out of Provo for five years and still everything seemed so ... the same .... to me. (Well, I was surprised at how big the mountains are here. I guess I'd forgotten that.)

The rest of this week won't be quite as fun as we are driving across the country. But I've made this drive so many times it hardly seems like a challenge anymore. Plus, I'm going to a Cubs game on Saturday. At least I'll have that to look forward to.